Nesting

I am moving...again. My family and friends are not too surprised. I seem to do this sort of thing at least every decade and sometimes even more often. For nine years I have enjoyed my mid-century modern home in a wooded sanctuary not far from the University of North Carolina campus in Chapel Hill. Now we are moving to a condominium that was carved out of a 1937 building that once housed 30 plus student studio apartments. We will be right across from campus on Franklin Street with the spreading oaks of McCorkle Place as our front lawn.  

 As many times as I have done it, moving is still a challenge. But I love creating homes and making spaces work for me and my family. I laugh when I think of the number of times I thought I was doing it for the last time-making a home that I would live in the rest of my life. I no longer delude myself or get distracted by that thought. This new space, as did all the others in their time, manifests something about how I see my life now and a hope for the immediate future. 

 There is seed that needs planting, some new egg that needs to be sat upon in a nest to grow. Obviously, not everyone moves to a new physical space every time they change jobs or relationships or even how they think of themselves. I consider myself lucky to have those opportunities to “ground” the internal changes in the surroundings that support and reflect them. This new home actually feels and is more spacious than the last. I will have my own “play room”, so to speak with space for writing, art and sewing projects and meditation..all this and a window to observe a busy world right outside my door. For an introvert like me, it is a long sought hiding space with lots of outside stimulation when I want it.

 I also just like doing renovations, designing kitchens, working with a team of people to make something come to life. I wondered as I prepared my lovely house for sale if I could let go of it on a leap of faith that I could create another. Why not just stay where I am? I recalled that I had always left something of beauty and of myself in every home that I had been lucky enough to inhabit. Somehow this reframed the concern and I no longer felt I was being ungrateful for moving on. Finding new space and making it more workable and more beautiful is just something I do.

 Nesting  is a vey strong instinct for me. Maybe that is why there are bird houses both inside and outside both my homes. Birds are thought of as messengers of the spirit world. Nesting for me is like making room for spirit.

 In Martha’s Vineyard birds nest all around the house. I counted at least 7 species of birds in the eaves and trellises, the birdhouses , the garden shrubs and trees on the property. They ranged from the tiniest hummingbird nesting in one of our oaks to the pair of osprey who have returned this third year.

 I pull out my binoculars every morning waiting to see if there is a osprey hatchling poking his head above the nest. The mother osprey has gotten used to my forays into the garden. She trills only a short warning now, but when I answer with a whistle, she stops and doesn’t fly off. It takes patience to sit on a nest- to take care of what you create and nurture there, and then courage to let it go ...trusting what will happen next.

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